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Emmy’s … I know, I’m a hater 21 September, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — chocolatemergency @ 02:55

Those girls weren't eating THIS before the Emmy's!WHAT ON EARTH?!  Hand me $2,000 and I will walk into a party looking goooood!  And I am nowhere near a size 2 or 0 or whatever it is these toothpicks say they are.  Side note: someone needs to give most of these girls a burger, they just have to be hungry!

Anyway, I usually take a peak at dresses and such, but this time … O M G!  Now that I’m thinking about it, maybe there is a stylist strike going on … why would I have heard about that?  And maybe these women are so dependent upon said stylist that they panic and grab the first tablecloth or reach into their closet and grab the first old bridesmaid dress

they can find.  Seriously.

There were so many bad dresses that I ignored guests (yikes!) and a few of the stars who are often wearing fugly clothes.  You know … like Sarah Silverman.  Funny girl, but she doesn’t let it stop with her words and follows through with her clothes.  Hmm … dedication to her craft maybe.


Taking the new supernatural tv themes far too seriously.  Even Kristin Stewert and Rpattz aren’t showing up in stuff like this!

Kristen Wiig

Even I want to make some snarky witch comment.


The wedding crew:

Elizabeth Perkins

I swear I’ve seen pictures of mother’s of the bride wearing this same dress … back in the 70’s.

Joely Fisher

Another one … Joely Fisher, funny girl but a really, really … I can’t even say these are bad dresses.  I mean, a bad dress is one that might have worked, but just didn’t.  These dresses were never, ever, EVER going to work!

Kara DioGuardi

Kara knows she’d like to have kids some day and that some day those kids will make her a grandma.  She just wanted to be prepared for the day those grandkids get married.


The previously mentioned table cloth:

Chloe Sevigny


Most unfortunate red carpet innocent victim:

Kristen Wiig

Who do you look at?  The woman wearing the really weird dress or the woman picking her ass in the background?  (See her?  No, well, look to the left of January Jones.  There ya go.)


Strangest moment:

Carrie Preston

What on earth ….


Saddest moment:

Patricia Arquette

Oh Patricia.  This makes me want to weep.  And I’m somewhat serious.  In every picture I’ve ever seen of her and even in her acting, this uncomfortable feeling always seeps out.  She just doesn’t seem happy with herself.  BE happy, girl!  Who cares if you aren’t 110 lbs?  What is so very sad about this dress is that the other women … they don’t seem to know it.  Even table cloth girl.  But, Patricia?  She knows it.  She knows that her boobs are shoved into this dress and are half falling out … but only on one side.  She knows that it looks like her dress used to have two sleeves, but she ripped it putting it on and this was the “fix”.  Ugh.

So, to end on a high note there were a couple dresses I liked.  Jennifer Love Hewitt’s dress was beautiful.  Maybe a little too run-through-the-woods-I’m-a-fairy-princess lalalalalaaaaa.  Sorry.  But, I thought it was pretty.  Sandra Oh, stunning.  Heidi Klum … I mean, how you squeeze yourself into a dress, deal with all the hair and makeup and then stand around looking ridiculously beautiful in the heat WHILE 9 months pregnant, I have no clue, but she did it.

Out of them all, here are my two faves.

Toni Collete

I have been a fan of Toni Collete’s for a long, long time now.  I “discovered” her about 10 or 12 years ago when she was in a movie with Gwyneth Paltrow and then saw her in another Aussie movie.  Love her and I’m so glad that she’s not only making waves here with her acting, but that she also looked super fab in this wicked dress.  Makes me think of a glammed up pirate with all the ripped skirts and stuff.  Look, I never said I was a fashion expert.

Drew Barrymore

Drew … there is something a little less flowy (yes, it’s a word … or it should be) than Toni’s, bu I still like it.  She looks amazing.  I thought this color would wash her out, but she pulls it off.  She pulls off just about anything.  I think it’s about attitude.  She needs to sit down with Patricia.


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